Some more thinking

I sat outside with the puppy in a sling sleeping on my chest and guess what. I got to thinking!! I have 3 weeks left in Guate and only 5 more days where I won't be super busy. I guess now is the time to think!

I can't believe my trip is nearing a close! It has been such an awesome experience. I've experienced so many different emotions. Joy, comraderie, sorrow, hope, pessimism, just to name a few. This country is such an array of beauty, whether it be the hardened, innocent eyes, the magnificent volcanoes, the childrens smiles, the spectacular jungle, or the serenades of days wished well. It is a country full of pain yet is such a magical place. I find my self very sad today, though Im sure watching another puppy be put down is only adding to it. Im really going to miss this place. It has such a special place in my heart and although I know I will back, I can't help feeling a little despair in knowing I get to go home to a warm bed, a loving family and the comforts of the first world. One would think this would get me a little excited, though yes I look forward to seeing all my loved ones. But it kind of feels a little superficial. Just another Gringo that came and loaded up their feel good tank, put in some honest hours of hard work, but quickly gets to leave all the pain behind. I get to go home, enjoy my clean water, my human rights, my medical system and a healthy family. My tank is full so I can sleep at night because I put my token month in, feeling good about myself and getting to share all the wonderful stories about how I did some good in the world. I can pat myself on the back because I dug a few holes, tipped a few workers and saved a few dogs from pain. But at the end of the day, the children are still in poverty, the dogs are still starving and parents and children have to work long hours for little pay just to put a few nutritionally lacking meals on the table for their children. And this is only one town, one country, one continent! It just doesn't feel right getting to leave it all behind and continue walking down the golden streets of Canada. We have our issues for sure, and I am certainly not happy with the treatment of so many underprivileged people back home, but I think trips like this change you. I am certainly a better person. My heart is warmer, my arms are wider and my motivation deeper, but it just doesn't sit well because I know I am no better or deserving than all the wonderful people I have met here!

I wish everyone back home would spend some time bridging the gap between the first and the third world. I wish everyone would spend a month or two out of their year or donate some money but certainly open their minds. Maybe the world wouldn't be so hard for so many! Maybe my small contribution would look so much bigger if I had 100 hands beside me, not 10. If everyone in the first world helped to bring the third world even just a little closer, so many people would live so much better! Sheltered, privileged people back home would have a greater appreciation for how they live and so many people struggling to make ends meat may be able to live a little lighter! Would it be so bad if everyone lived in the second world? If we shared just a little, helped those who need a hand and bridge that gap just a little? Would it be so bad for us to live at 75% so so many could live at 50? Is that compromise so bad??

I know this won't be my last volunteer "vacation". I can't go home and pat myself on the back and forget about all I saw. I don't just want, I don't need but I have to help! My life has a purpose, one I was always aware of, but one I now will live! I'm going to take a few steps down and hopefully in doing so I can help a few people up!! Though I will always have the luxuries of home available to me and there will be times I indulge, I will stop the cycle of over-consumption, at least for myself, and Im going to take moments of each day and dedicate them to making this world just a little closer. Refocus some of my spending and my time and shift the privilege just a little. Parents deserve to see their children grow up, children deserve the opportunity to do so with patience, and animals deserve a little peace from time to time. If every week, instead of indulging the first world appetite, I give a little, rather than take, I can help make some permanent change. Guatemala has given so much to me and I vow that I will give back.

The job site

I have said it before, this is such a beautiful place. You are on the side of a valley, with 360 degree views, volcanoes in every direction and nothing but sky all around. It's absolutely spectacular!! 

Today was probably the hardest physical labour day I have had since I have been here. We were making adobe eco-bricks out of mud and pine needles. They will eventually be the wall that surrounds the houses and keeps the children safe. All day, slumped over with a large hoe packing mud into a wheel barrow, then taking the wheel barrow over the workers with the mold. Then using the hoe to drop mud into each mold. One by one. My body forgot what its like to my on a shovel all day! Each shovel full of mud must have weighed between 5-10 lbs. Im so very tired but wow, did the work feel good. It's amazing how hard work doesn't feel so difficult when it's for such a great cause!! But again, I sat in awe of these workers. All day, every day, they work this hard. I was watching these small, skinny mayan men, hour after hour, mixing the mud like an art. It's grueling work, and they are so strong, that they made each shovel of mud look like feathers. They had such a way of doing it, that each swing was meticulous. It took me about an hour to even start to use my shovel like they could. I had a great day though!! At points, I could hear them "something something la gringa". How I wish I could have understood what they were saying! They were all smiles with me all day so I am going to guess is was all good. I would like to think that I was a bit of an ambassador for women today. I was right there beside them, swinging my shovel all day. By the end of the day, by biceps were shaking and my back muscles aching but I feel like I accomplished so much!! It was good to see the guys slowing down by 2:30. I was glad I wasn't the only one getting tired.   :)

Now, I will head off the local coffee shop, have a tasty latte ( $2) and play a little blokus with the barista. 

I forgot to give you a puppy update

So Jenga has come so far. She goes out of her way to come say hi, regularly sniff's my face and lets me pet her back now. Sometimes I can't move to quickly still, but when I came in the house after my walk, she let me give her a good two handed belly/back rub. tika gets super excited when I come back. She actually slept in my room last night, which she hadn't done the first night without her people. And of course, Bindi. What a little cuddle bum! She spent the majority of the night in my arms, snuggled up tightly in my neck. They are all such sweet dogs and I know I will miss them tons when I leave!

este manana (im sure I used the wrong word for "this" lol)

Good morning. This morning I decided to take my morning walk and dedicate it too all the puppies I see on the road. I walked around taking pictures of all the street dogs. Its so sad to watch them cower and quickly move away from every time I pulled out my camera because they are so used to having rocks, etc thrown at them. This morning I even saw two children throw rocks at two dogs minding there own business soaking up some of the sunshine. Just another day in a Guatemalan street dogs life. The locals look at me so funny when I take pictures of the dogs. They just don't get it. lol

It is also Sunday which means market day! I wanted to go get some pictures of the market. The Guatemalan people are all very short so I get laughed at regularly as I walk through getting close-lined by ropes, bags, belts, you name it. Everyone walks under with no problem, but every so often I'll hit my head pretty good and I hear a couple chuckles out of the near by locals. They all like to tell me "muy alto" which means very tall. I get such a kick out of how often I get told that down here. I'm 5'8!!! I don't consider myself tall at all but I feel like a giant walking through the market, with most tarps strung up at height of about 5'5.

As I walked to the market I had the usual passer by's wish me good days. but one gentleman stuck out. He had a bit of a limp and I couldn't tell if he was drunk or not. As I got closer, I could see he looked as if he was in his late fifties, early sixties. Dirty some what disheveled clothes. His face hardened with a life of hard work and sun. In Canada, this guy would have made me nervous and I probably would have crossed the street. I watched him with caution and kept an eye on him. As we got near each other, I finally decided to smile. When he looked up and caught the warm look on my face, his hardened features instantly warmed up and his tired eyes became filled with an almost youthful exuberance. "Buenos Diaz" he said with such an enthusiastic tone of voice. I was instantly reminded how hardened North America has made me. Here I was, ready to just walk right by, and possibly even cross the street, when all I needed to do was smile. It was this moment that it really hit me how isolated we make ourselves in North America. I frequently catch myself walking down the street here, head down or unconsciously avoiding eye contact, focused on getting to my destination but missing everything in between! We have built habits that create a bubble for our own individual lives and as a result, we miss so much around us.

I spent two hours sitting on a step in the square of Tecpan, just watching the daily lives take place in front of me. Children and their mothers, 3 generations of cowboys, the smallest maybe 6 years old, all dressed in jeans and identical white cowboy hats. Small boys working shining shoes, their clothes beaten but their eyes still innocent. One young boy, clearly tired from working in the sun all day sat down beside me. He had a shoe that had completely split open, his toes exposed, dirty from head to toe, but when he smiled at me, it was as if none of that mattered. Was he aware of my predetermined North American notions? Did he see himself the same way your average person back home would see him? Full of pity and an idea that he is not of the class North Americans are. Does he feel less of a child because he works all day and after schools, to help his family put food on the table? We come down here with these ideas, many of us full of compassionate, yet so ingrained with our stereotypes. Why can we not look at poor children back home through the same pair of eyes?

As I continued to watch the world go on around me, another young boy sat down beside me. He had his shoe shining kit and it looked as if he wanted to convince me to let him "shine" my white running shoes. He would look at his kit, then at my shoes, then back at his kit just to look at my shoes again. He noticed the camera in my hand and he so wanted to have a look. He gave himself an opportunity to take a break and talk to the "gringa". He eventually got bored and continued on his way. Motorcycles passed with small children riding between their dads arms, some times 3 or 4 people piled on weaving in and out of traffic. I even saw a police motorcycle pass with two officers on it. Women in traditional clothes carrying heavy loads on their heads. Their children in training following close behind. Children playing in the street with whatever they could find. One child played for over an hour with a green plastic milk crate, pulling it behind him with nothing but a rope. Heaven forbid he ever discovers "game station" (the guatemalan equivalent to playstation). You couples walking hand in hand, enamored with their new found feelings. Horses, old style buggies being pulled my hand, collectivo trucks packed with at least 30 people. Local cell phone company trucks with music blaring from their speakers attached to the roofs. Tuk-tuks (local taxi's that are essentially identical to a golf cart but smaller) whipping in and out of people and other vehicles. I watched this very young, (no more than 2 years old) girl playing with her older sister as mom manned the kiosk she was running. She was so adorable dressed in traditional clothes and a toque on her head. I think her feet were still learning how to keep her body upright, because she kept wobbling as she ran after her sister. Chicken buses, men carrying large bags on their backs and the ice cream man's obnoxious bell 3 feet from where I sat. It was one of the best afternoons I've had yet!

Update

Hello everyone. Its been a week and a half so I'll give you an update on my trip.

After the tour ended I stayed in Antigua and studying spanish for a week. It was fun and I would like to have a month of nothing but spanish everyday. I love Antigua, but once everyone left, I did feel a little limited on what I could do. There only so many streets to walk down and I couldn't be out by myself after 7 or 8. I loved my teacher though and I plan on taking more lessons with her in the future. Its amazing how quickly it leaves you though.

I have been in Tecpan for the last week volunteering with project somos. The houses are coming along so quickly! All the volunteers and the project founders area great. I've really enjoyed getting to know everyone! I've been doing a little of everything. Carpentry help, glass work, gardening stuff. All of it has been so fun. The workers are great and its awesome getting my daily dog fix both on the land and in the volunteer house. The dogs are so sweet here! And of course there was the soccer game. For those of you who are familiar with the field, it is now twice as big!!! You don't realize your at 7500ft until you try running. But I had a great time. The field reminds me of apex. (apex is a ski hill in bc that holds hockey tournaments every year. The ice is really bad and it can be pretty hard to skate on) The field here is uneven, fully of obstacles like hills, rocks and dirt piles. I think it evens the playing field quite a bit, just like apex! At least this time it works in my favor!!!! lol The volunteer house is very much like living with your family Everyone gets there turn on lunch, dinners and clean up. The town here is small but at least there is a great coffee shop run by such a friendly family. The kids are so cute. They are really trying to learn english so they like to show off their sentences some times. I love going there some times in the evening and next week Im going to start playing board games with them. Now if only I can teach them that we canadians need our coffee before 3pm!!

I miss my little man so much. Dad, I hope you are taking good care of him!! Tell him I love him and give him a good ear scratch from me!! Heather and Greg's dogs are a wonderful temporary replacement for me though. Tika is a corgi shephard x who is as sharp as a tack! I like to brag about how smart cosmo is, but I think Tika may take him in this department. Jenga is the street dog they rescued and Bindi is one of her pups. Bindi looks sooooo much like cosmo when he was a puppy! Though Bindi has a bit of a diva attitude. I think she thinks she owns the place! Jenga has taken some time to warm up to me though we have made HUGE strides the last few days. Unfortunately dogs aren't respected or treated well here so she is a little apprehensive around new people. She's been hanging around me a lot more and even lets me pet her now. This morning I was pretty convinced she contemplated even playing with me, but changed her mind at the last second. I think Bindi and I are going to be a little bonded by the time I leave which will suck, because then I'll just be missing a dog when Im home too! :(

My weekend will be spent studying spanish and drinking lattes while watching my patriots KICK SOME GIANT BUTT!!! 10 seasons as a starter, 5 super bowl appearances, 3 wins! One more is being added tomorrow!!

I really do truly love this place and I get asked regularly by locals why. "They say Canada is the best place in the world." It's hard to explain, particularly without the ability to articulate, however this country is something special. Everyone I have ever talked to comes back saying it was amazing. Im not sure there are even words in English I could use to truly let you understand. It is a diverse, beautiful country where culture runs deep. They have held on to 23 (?) mayan dialects and many of the mayans speak spanish as a second language. In every community, you see the women wearing vibrate colours on their traditional mayan clothing and even the occasional man. Each community has their own designs and colors that set them apart. Even though it hard to look at the positives of another culture coming in and overtaking, the spanish architecture is beautiful. The colours on the streets of antigua is spectacular. And of course the people. They are so warm and friendly, and it doesn't seem to matter where you go, some will always smile and say hello. It's amazing how good a simple little smile can feel. Even on the job site, as we work in the shed by the road, people walking by never hesitate to make eye contact and wave, often accompanied by a "buenos.. diaz/tardes". The children here are beautiful! Their HUGE gentle brown eyes, perfect smiles and innocent laughter will melt your heart!! Its absolutely adorable to see a little 4 or 5 year girl dressed up in traditional mayan clothes looking identical to her mother as they walk down the street!

The markets here are definitely a sight! Booths and people everywhere and dogs hoping they finally getting an opportunity to eat. Fruit, clothes, dishes, you name it, its here. After they are done, they throw all their garbage into the streets and the dogs have about an hour to feast. I once saw a mound of garbage about 3 ft high with apx 15 dogs gorging themselves. Thursday I saw the cutest small little black dog running with a massive bag of who knows what. There was no stopping this guy! He looked like he'd just won the lottery! After everyone has taken down their stands, it seems as though the garbage just disappears. It literally takes about an hour and the streets are empty again, no sign of the garbage, and its business as usual.

As I write this, I just had a little break through with Jenga. She nosed my face for the first time and let me pet her with two hands. I'm winning her over!!!

I had a truly latin american experience yesterday, though I can't share because my mother reads this. She'd kill me!! But I had to do it once and it was a blast!! I understand why Cosmo loves it so much!

Well, here is my trip for the last couple weeks

some morning thoughts

As I sat here doing my spanish homework this morning, I watched the night guy from my hotel "mow" the lawn and it certainly had my brain working. Guatemalans don't have fancy lawnmowers. The don't even have the old school metal wheel with blades. He has been "mowing" the lawn for 3 hours using a machete. A MACHETE!! He has been bent over for three hours cutting the grass BY HAND with only a machete and as I write this, he continues. All of this after he had a 12 hour night shift. While I sat here, he would take a break here and there and chat a little bit. I found out he has two children at home; a girl who is 1 and a boy who is 5. He works apx 20 hours a day to provide for his family. It makes me ill to think how I sit here on my Macbook (albeit 6 or 7 years old), with my digital camera planning a two week vacation to Belize. I have no concept of what families all over the world must go through every day to ensure their children have the very basics to survive. But what amazes me the most is how warm and welcoming almost all of them are. Every morning I go for a little walk around the town and Im almost serenaded with "Buenos Dias'". The smiles are infectious and their eyes are innocent. It amazes me how genuinely friendly these people are despite their hardships. It regularly brings me back to all the "1st world problems" we get so caught up in back "home". Maybe this is why I have always struggle to find the place I call home. I've always struggled with the concept of Chasing the Jones'. I was never motivated by how much more money I could make then you. I don't care what my business card or name tag says. And I certainly don't feel any better about myself because of where I shop. I know I have said it before, but life makes sense down here. However, the irony is not lost on me. We live our spoiled little lives, always so quick to judge someone else for their "status". Expectations that go beyond just being gluttonous. All the while there are so many people in the world just happy for friends, family and health. Although none of this was new to my thought process, this trip has been truly special. I didn't grow up requiring a reality check or an eye opening experience to comprehend what poverty means. My parents did an excellent job of ensuring I never lost sight of what truly matters. But I have found a certain calmness in my existence down here. Even an acceptance not easily found back home. Don't get me wrong, there is plenty of darkness down here too, but an overwhelmingly large concept that we are one. That everyone is both a true individual, deserving of warmth, respect and happiness, but also a part of something so much bigger and special. The more time I spend in 3rd world latin countries, the more I am reminded that world is not about how much money you make your boss, your hour long commute because the greedy rich have made real estate impossible for the average citizen, or about being so exhausted on Saturday that you hardly have time to truly enjoy your loved ones. This is my challenge to myself. To find that same calm amongst the chaos of corporate North America. To find the the infectious smiles that coexist with innocent eyes. To find a little peace amongst the dog fight. And to spend every day, without fail, to ensure what really matters in our world is what matters in my word. I challenge you to join me!

The tour pt 1

So here is my long awaited blog about the tour.

It definitely started off interesting, as so many travel days to central america do. The airport connections are terrible and if you are lucky enough to get bad information, you will be stuck sleeping on the outside, on linoleum without a single place to get dinner. Thank you Continental and the Houston Airport. But alas, I survived my LONG night, despite the buffer guy at 4:30. The second I stepped out of the airport and smelt the tropical air I knew I was home. To anyone who has travelled down here, you know what I am talking about. Monika, you'll know soon enough. :) I arrived two days before the tour started and I spent them reacquainting myself with Antigua. The warm colours, the cobblestone streets, the ruins from many an earthquake and of course, the smiling faces. It was awesome to see the sun again too. Is it bad that I spent my first night watching the Canucks game?!?

The tour started on tuesday and the group instantly meshed. We all had lots to talk about and a common theme to bond us. As the days progressed, it was really awesome to watch people of all walks of life come together. The group made my transition very easy and am thankful for all your wonderful comments!!

When we left Antigua for Tecpan, the van was full of excitement. We arrived at the job site to prominent volcano's, deep valleys and 360 degree views. I had seen many pictures but this one took my breath away. We had one of the warmest welcomes I think I have ever received from a stranger. Both Heather and Greg, founders, and Antolin, the forman, were wonderful. I can't begin to explain to you the energy on that job site. Im glad I was wearing sunglasses for their welcome speeches because any "tough" exterior I may have had going in was quickly washed away with joyous tears. Prior to my arrival it was obvious the group was going to mesh well, but I think it was this moment that we became a family! After our tour of the job site, we headed back to our adorable hotel for dinner. I'm not sure any of us got much sleep that night. :) 

(to keep you in real time, I just got pooped on while writing.. is it really good luck to be pooped on by a bird, or is the luck just in the fact that it landed on you?!?)

Our first day was exciting and tiring all in the same. You get a true idea of what people's work lives are like down here. In north america we live our lives spoiled and sheltered. Having spent time on construction sites back home, you take for granted modern tools and technology. As each day passed, we were faced with challenges you just aren't used to at home. Older tools, fewer tools, actually having to use blood sweat and tears rather than I battery powered device. My job for the first two days was to rebuild a shed that had been torn down by a multi day wind storm. It felt really good to get my hands dirty again! Others were mudding the gathering circle where we received our very warm welcome. I was in awe watching the local workers mix concrete for hours on end all by hand. The shear strength that would take was incredible but their work ethic was inspiring. Each one of these workers just put their head down and got the job done. Was the motivation the amazing project they have been so lucky to be a part of? Was it a perspective we have lost in the western world? Maybe it was a combination of both. 

After the first day was over, we were all very tired. A long day in the sun, hard work and the calm of knowing you officially became a part of something special. Each one of us became bonded for life!

The next day was just as fulfilling, except this time we had a special invite. A "friendly" match of soccer.  I think that was the most fun I have ever had playing soccer. The uneven terrain, the small field and even being toyed with by the far superior skills of the workers was a blast. You don't realize you are at 7500 ft until you try playing soccer. As everyone watched the game, it was awesome to see the smiles on every single person on that job site. 

Our first few days were amazing. We saw our progress with the children's houses and made new friends we never would have been able to otherwise, but its hard not to be reminded of how difficult life is for so many down here. Its hard to ignore the poverty; whether it be hungry dogs so obviously in pain, roofs that have collapsed in or watching children no older than 3 or 4 having to work long hours trying to sell to the tourists. It truly is heart breaking. I think this is why I find Heather and Greg so inspiring. They were some of the lucky ones born to an easier way of life in North America yet they CHOOSE to dedicate theirs to under privileged children so desperately in need of love. The world truly needs more people like them!

After our first excursion day fell on the Saturday. A day of R and R at the spectacular Lago de Atitlan. We travelled to San Marcos, a little hippy town on the lake where we were finally able eat vegetables. Who would have thought that I would have missed lettuce! Unfortunately our day of quiet was quickly interrupted with the new mayoral inauguration parties. As we sat enjoying a tasty brownie watching a football game, it suddenly sounded like a gun went off 20 ft from the patio. Apparently the guatemalans in San Marcos entertain themselves with firecrackers here too. 

That night I was surprised with a beautiful birthday card full of wonderful well wishes and a celebration by a fire on the lake. It was awesome! Although I have to say I disappointed myself only finishing 1/2 of my tetra pack of wine. Robyn, you did me proud!!!! (side note: not even in guatemala for shits and giggles is drinking cheap wine out of a tetra pack a good idea) After the fire, the few that were still up went to a local hippy bar. What an experience. I have to say I felt a little uncomfortable amongst the bare feet and petchulli.  But it was a pretty cool bar set up like a giant tree house!

__________________________________________________________________________

to be continued ( i have to get back to practicing my spanish)

I finally remembered how to get back to my blog lol

Ive been here for 2 weeks now and its still like home. The people here are so friendly and welcoming. In two weeks Ive had more "hello's and good mornings" than a year in Vancouver. The atmosphere is laid back and there is no indication of the daily grind. They know how to work here but they appreciate life and I have to say it's contagious. For some reason, life makes sense down here. I can't say the same for western cities. I had my first official tour and it was amazing!!!! the job site is one of the most amazing sceneries I have ever had the privilege of working in. And for those of you who have seen my pics, you know I've seen a lot! Project somos is such an experience. I can't begin to explain how it will touch your heart. I was really looking forward to my participation but I never anticipated the deeper meaning it brought to my life! The work crew are so helpful, warm and light hearted. Heather and Greg, the founders, are as real as any one I have ever met. Their vision is inspiring!! The foreman is a mayan spiritual leader and there is absolutely no way to articulate the welcome he will give you. I encourage everyone to get involved. Whether it be with a small donation, sponsoring a blanket for a child or coming with me on a voluntour! It has been the most spectacular experience of my life. I will give more details later but Im off to my spanish lessons. Talk soon!

Day 3, Post 1: Official start date of the voluntour!

Well I have been here for 2 days now. It was a rough start, as travelling on international economy flights usually is. But I feel a bit human after two decent nights sleeps. I haven't done much other than walk around Antigua, though there isn't a dull block in the this city. Its absolutely spectacular here. Cobblestone roads, spanish colonial architecture and multiple volcanoes in the background. It is definitely quite the site! The last few remaining guests arrive today and tomorrow we travel to the project somos site. Im very excited. If anyone is interested in finding out more about the the voluntour company El Camino or the children's village we are working on Project Somos, here are their respective websites.

El Camino:    voluntours.ca

Project Somos:   projectsomos.org

I don't have much to share yet, but the adventure is officially starting today.